Wanna Bet, Allwet?
by Ryan Rinkerman
Summary: After Junior acts like a jerk for the billionth day in a row, Allstar decides to make a bet with him.


**Wanna Bet, Allwet?  
**By Ryan Rinkerman  
Written 1/14/2005-1/17/2005

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

Junior smacked his alarm clock and got out of bed. "Grrr…I'm in a really bad mood!" Junior growled. "Nobody better cross me today!"

After getting dressed, he walked down the street. He bumped into Tooter. "What, you didn't see me or something? Try watching where you're going!" Tooter whistled apologetically, but Junior didn't want to hear it. "No, don't apologize! I don't care to listen to your horrible honking anyway!" Tooter glared at Junior as he walked away.

Junior walked further down the street, and saw a blue Snork with long brown hair. She wore a red uniform, and stood next to a large pot with the words "Please Give" written on it. "Sir! Sir!" the Snork called.

"And just what do YOU want, lady?" Junior asked.

"I work for the Shellvation Army!" the charity worker replied. "We're collecting money for underprivileged Snorks! Won't you give us anything?"

"Yeah, I'll give you a broken snork if you ever approach me for money again!" Junior walked past her without dropping a thing in the pot.

He walked up to a burger stand. Jo-Jo was leaning on the counter, leisurely looking at the menu.

"Hmm, I would like…"

"Shove over, Double-snork!" Junior pushed Jo-Jo out of the way. "Gimme a Quarter Flounder with everything on it!" Junior shouted at the man behind the counter. "And make it snappy!"

Jo-Jo walked over to Daffney and Allstar, who were sitting at a table eating. "Hi, Jo-Jo! What's new?" Daffney asked.

"Junior is being rude today!" he remarked.

"No, Jo-Jo!" Daffney exclaimed. "I asked what was NEW!"

"I've been watching Junior today." Allstar told his friends. "So far he's screamed at Tooter, insulted a charity worker, and knocked Jo-Jo over for a lousy burger!"

"Wow, he's being nicer than usual!" Daffney remarked.

"Why must Junior always act this way?" Jo-Jo asked. "Can't he get through one day without being mean?"

Allstar thought for a second. That gave him a good idea. "We'll see…" He got up from the table. "I'll be right back, fellas!" Allstar swam over to Junior, who was eating his Quarter Flounder.

"Well, if it isn't Allwet Unworthy!"

"Junior, have you ever heard the old saying 'Don't pop your cork, be kind to fellow Snorks?'"

Junior glared at Allstar. "No. And why would I care?"

"Because it's tough to get along with you when you're always so mean and selfish!"

"What do you mean, Allwet?" Junior scoffed. "Sure I may have a mean streak, but I can be nice and helpful when I want to!"

"Helpful, huh?" Allstar frowned. "What about that time last year when I needed help gathering salt, and you tried to steal it all?"

"Uh, well…"

"And you weren't exactly eager to help when Tooter was falsely arrested for bank robbery last month!"

"Um…"

"And how about yesterday, when-"

"I GET THE POINT, ALLWET! Did you come over just to insult me?"

"No, Junior. I'd like to make a bet with you!"

"I don't have time for something stupid like this!" Junior started to walk away.

"It's for 500 clams!" Allstar called out.

Junior swam back to Allstar. "Keep talking, buddy! I got plenty of time!"

"It's simple, Junior! Right now it's…" Allstar glanced at his watch. "10 in the morning. If you can be nice, polite, and courteous until 5 in the afternoon, I'll give you 500 clams! But if you mess up, EVEN ONCE, I get 500 clams from you! Think you can do it?"

"Sure I can, Allwe-" Junior stopped himself.

Allstar waved his finger. "Uh-uh! What were you going to say?"

"Uh…Allstar!"

"There! Now was that so hard?"

"Hardest thing I've ever done!" he replied. He then thought to himself, "HA! This'll be a piece of kelp cake! I can just lie and say-"

"One more thing!" Allstar interrupted Junior's train of thought. "I'm going to be following you the whole time to make sure you follow the rules!"

"Great." Junior sighed. "The things I do for money!"

_Later on…_

Junior walked down the street. "Don't worry, Junior!" he told himself. "It's only seven hours! Surely you can do this for seven hours!" He approached the corner, and saw the same charity worker, still trying to collect money.

"Sir! Can you spare some change?" she asked.

"Didn't you hear me the first time, lady?" Junior retorted curtly. "I told you I wasn't going to give you anything, and I meant-"

Just then, he noticed Allstar watching him from across the street. "…uh, I meant to say yes!" Junior reached into his pocket and pulled out some money. "Uh…here's 50 clams!"

"Oh, sir!" the woman exclaimed happily. "It's so nice to see someone as kind and giving as you! We need more Snorks exactly like you in the ocean!"

Allstar cringed at that thought.

"No problem!" Junior put on his phoniest smile. "At least I'll make a 450 clam profit on this bet!" he thought to himself as he walked over to Allstar. "I hope you're happy, Allwe…star! I just gave away my own money!"

"It was for a worthy cause, Junior!"

"It was still MY money! I can't keep this up for much longer! How close are we to 5 o'clock?"

Allstar checked his watch. "Junior, it's only 10:30! We've only been doing this for a half-hour!"

Junior sighed. "Great…"

_2:07 PM…_

Junior was hungry again. He saw that the burger stand had just one person in line; an elderly Snork in a pink dress. Junior stood behind the old woman. "I guess waiting in line won't kill me!" he thought.

"That'll be 15 and a half clams!" the man behind the counter told the old lady.

"Hmm…let's see here…" the old woman reached into her purse. She slowly put a clam on the counter. "Now that's one…"

Junior watched as the old lady slowly went through her purse. "Hey, could ya hurry up a bit…please?" he said. "There's a line here!"

"Don't get your snork in a knot, sonny!" the old lady snapped back. "Now, here's two…no, that's my mirror…hmm…"

"I don't have the time to stand here all day, lady!"

"Oh, here's another one! Nope, that's my comb. I think this is a…no…"

"All right!" Junior shouted. "That's enough! I'm going to-" he saw Allstar out of the corner of his eye, still watching him closely. "-uh, I'm going to help you with your money!"

"Oh, thank you, sonny! You're such a sweet young boy!"

"That's something I thought I'd never hear someone say to Junior!" Allstar said to himself.

Junior opened the woman's purse, pulled out the clams, and handed the purse back. "There you go, ma'm! Have a great day!"

After Junior got his food, he walked over to Allstar. "This is killing me here! I probably could've been there WAY past 5!"

"Not to worry, Junior! You have about three hours left to go!"

"This is great!" Junior thought. "I just might pull this off after all! 500 clams, here I come!"

_4:45 PM…_

Allstar walked with Junior down the street. "Junior, you've surprised me! You've lasted almost the full seven hours!"

"Told ya so, Allstar!"

"Look over there!" Allstar pointed across the street. Jo-Jo, Daffney, and Tooter were chatting. "I think it would be nice if you went over and said hi!"

"Fine. I've got those clams in the bag anyway! I can afford to be generous…with my time, that is!" He swam over to the three and smiled. "Hey, guys! How are you?"

The three Snorks were so startled they didn't know how to react. "Junior…being nice?" Jo-Jo raised an eyebrow. "You must want something from us. What is it?"

Tooter whistled suspiciously.

Junior sighed. "No, guys, I don't want anything. I just came over to say hi!"

Daffney shook her head. "Poor Junior. He must be sick! Must be another case of Snorkitis!"

Junior was getting impatient. "No, I'm not sick! I-"

"Finally went crazy, right?" Daffney interrupted.

"NO! I'm genuinely being nice to you guys! Otherwise, I don't get anything!"

"What do mean, Junior?" Jo-Jo asked. "Why would you get something for being nice to us?"

Now Junior was getting mad. "I have about ten minutes left to be nice to everybody, and if I do it, I win a 500 clam bet!"

"Oh, that's what it is!" Daffney giggled. "I didn't think Junior would do something like that on his own!" Tooter and Jo-Jo laughed.

Junior gritted his teeth. "I had to do this for almost seven hours!"

"I'm amazed you lasted seven seconds!" Daffney responded. Tooter laughed at her quip.

"Good thing it was just seven hours!" Jo-Jo said. "Someone like Junior couldn't keep it up for any longer than that!"

Junior's rage had built up to a fever pitch. He jumped up and screamed at the three, "Well, what makes you think YOU'RE better than me? I'm still better than any of you losers!" He walked up to Tooter and poked him in the stomach. "Look at you, you green goon! Do you know how annoying it is to hear you walk around, going 'Toot toot! Ah! Beep beep!' LEARN TO SPEAK ENGLISH, IDIOT! And change your wardrobe; St. Patrick's Day is still 8 months away!"

Tooter let out a low honk as Junior turned to Jo-Jo. "And you, Tarzan Boy! Talk about behind the times! This is 1986, and you act as if we're still living in caves! 'Unga bunga! Me moron!' Oh, and PLEASE put on a shirt! Nobody wants to stare at your chest all day!"

Then Junior turned to Daffney. "Oh, and YOU! You always have to look so pretty all the time, with your dumb comb and your stupid mirror. Maybe if you spent time reading instead of dolling yourself up, you could impress Snorks with your wisdom instead of your looks! I mean, you're such an airhead, I'm shocked you haven't floated to the surface yet!"

Allstar walked up to Junior, smiling. Junior looked furious; his orange complexion had turned dark red, and steam was blowing through his snork. "And do you know what YOU are?" he snarled.

"The proud owner of 500 clams!" Allstar responded.

Junior sagged as he slowly realized what he had just done. His face turned back to normal as he stood there. Junior then fell to the ground, groaning. "So close…SO CLOSE!"

"And yet so far!" Allstar said as Junior reached for his wallet.

"Take it, Allwet! Just take it!"

Allstar walked up to Tooter, Jo-Jo, and Daffney, 500 clams in hand. "Hey, let's get some plank-burgers! My treat! What do you guys say?"

Daffney grinned excitedly. "You bet!"

THE END

LEGAL STUFF: Snorks created by Freddy Monnickendam. The rights to the Snorks are owned by Hanna-Barbera. All characters copyright Hanna-Barbera and SEPP, 1984-1989. I'm not affiliated with any of them; I'm just an obsessed Snork fan who loves writing stories about them.


End file.
